Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
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