just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
A part of me realizes this is a bad time to text. But I override it with my awesomeness
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
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