go do what you do best...puke behind churches
Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
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