I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
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