The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
Randomize
