trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
Randomize