i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
Randomize
