we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
Randomize
