I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
Randomize
