Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
