@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Randomize
