Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
Randomize
