I'm sooo using this pickup line: "Baby, its not the 2.5 inches... Its the 200 pounds behind it"
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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