All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
Randomize
