Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
and you fell through a lawn chair
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
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