you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
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