Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Randomize
