I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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