porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
I'm about 40% drunk. You know, not drunk enough to light the bar on fire, but drunk enough to let the cougar hit on me.
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
Randomize
