he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
Just spun two beer bottles and Placed them in my pockets perfect... I feel like the clint eastwood of drunks
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
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