Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
Randomize