someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
Your penis caused this!
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize
