Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
I know it's early but when you wake up can you please validate my life and tell me I'm not just a drunk idiot.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Randomize
