after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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