he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
Dude I got in an Uber this morning and he goes “I drove you last night”\n“You got your dick sucked in the back seat”
Randomize