if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
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