What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
no no no no you can't just say your dirtiest secret is "i sat on goldfish by accident once" and just leave i have QUESTIONS
AT LEAST TELL ME IF THE GOLDFISH WAS STILL IN A BOWL??????????????
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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