i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Randomize
