Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again.
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
Randomize
