I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
Be still, my beating vagina.
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
