Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
The low-flow toilet at my office cannot handle the intensity of this hangover.
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
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