My secretary told me she wishes she can have an affair with someone in the office (she's separated from her cheating husband)...Umm...Okaaay
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
I'm chasing vodka with french fries.
She left me with blue balls so I jerked off on her french toast in the morning.
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
What drink are we having for lunch?
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
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