OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
Randomize
