i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
I have left a significant number of teethmarks in my prhone. My mouth tastes like tequila and cheddar. Tomorrow already feels fun.
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
WHY IS THERE NO EMOJI FOR "FUCK MY MOM JUST SAW MY SEX BRUISES?!"
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
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