so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
Randomize
