Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
I woke up covered in my own vomit with a pocket full of napkins. I guess I knew I would need them, but was not coherent enough to use them before passing out.
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
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