I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
Just got a call at work, I have to consent to a random drug and alcohol test by end of business day, if you arranged this it's the best/worst April fools prank ever.
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
Found the puke drawer
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
Randomize
