it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
You layed on my kitchen floor with a pile of m&ms at your crotch, said "your lightbulb don't match, is that one new?"
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
Randomize
