Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
I don't want my vagina anymore.
I just spontaneously learned how to embroider at three in the morning.
I also almost burned the house down in the process. Don't ask me how. It's a long story.
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
Randomize