I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
Randomize
