what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
Randomize
