i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
Randomize