I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
Randomize
