Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
Randomize
