I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
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