I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
Randomize