Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
I'm eating cold pizza from work and drinking beer from a wine glass trying to decide if I want to shower or just rub one out and go to sleep. How have I ever gotten laid?
Because you're really hot before taking the time to actually get to know you.
Randomize
