why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
Randomize
