I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
He? As in you personified your dick?
Randomize
