I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
Randomize
